He had a speech appointment in an hour so we went to get lunch and go to the appointment. It was at a new location so we wanted to make sure we got there in plenty of time. Well, we were a half hour early. We went in and Gabe was being so bad. He was crawling under chairs, pushing them out of the way, pushing the car table into other kids, saying "no!" to me, running away, etc. I was so embarrassed so I took him back to the car, where he proceeded to smack me in the arm and kick. The tornado sirens went off AGAIN so we ran back inside. He acted the same as before but worse, if possible. Finally I decided to cancel- 5 minutes before his appointment. I honestly didn't know what to do. Once he got back to speech, I'm sure he would've been good because he adores his therapist... but I needed to prove a point that he can't get away with that. Well, he wouldn't come to me to leave and started yelling and kicking again, and then... the topper... smacks the wall as hard as he can. NICE. My face was SO red, I was dying of embarrassment, and I was SO SO mad.
We just got home and I put Gabe down right away. He screamed and hit. He's still crying and yelling.... wait, it's finally quiet.
I called his therapist to apologize and explain how silly I must've looked, leaving RIGHT before the appointment after waiting all that time, but I didn't know what else to do. So, moms of strong-willed toddlers, how would YOU handle a situation like that? I need tips, suggestions, things your friends do, etc.
Also, I'd really like to know how you deal with deliberate disobedience, which is what today was. It's becoming an ongoing problem with Gabe. He can be SO sweet, but when he is "off" he is way off. Please share, before I go crazy :)
4 comments:
First, don't be embarrassed, we have ALL been there... have you MET Keeghan?! :) He is the epitome of the perfect 3 year old... and by perfect, I mean horrible! HA! I love him dearly, but man, he's like Jekyl and Hyde!
I will also say, that "terrible two's" have NOTHING on threes, so be ready... when they're two they SAY no, when they're three they MEAN no! UGH! That being said, there ARE ways to get around it and beat your child... no wait. That didn't sound right. This mother does not EVER advocate beating your child. In theory. ;) However, you need to break the will and not the spirit! :) There are TONS of parenting books out there that you can read, and they will vary greatly from doing yoga (to doing yoga with your child) to literally beating your child... I don't recommend those books! haha But books can be frustrating because those "parents" seem to have it all figured out and have perfect kids who never throw fits and let's face it... they LIE! :)
I recommend this blog post, which is actually about 3 year olds, (I'm telling you, be ready!). It was written by the pastor of my church and it's a quick easy read. The biggest tip I can give from that post is be consistent! If he gets away with something, even once, then it's fair game. If it's ok one day, it's ok every day in his brain.
Keeghan seriously has the BEST memory (though he has no concept of time) and I will tell him not to do something and he will say, "But remember! You let me do it yesterday!" (Which was actually like 2 months ago... but he was RIGHT! Dangit!) Then he knows he's won because I get all exasperated because how the HECK does he remember that?! LOL So don't give in, even if you're tired. Stick with the rules!!!
Here's that blog post I was talking about... hope it helps:
http://www.ronedmondson.com/2009/10/7-tips-for-surviving-the-terrible-threes-of-parenting.html
Ohhh Laura,
I can only imagine how mortifying. I have been in that situation where my son is throwing a tantrum and all you can do is drag them away from the scene!
He is not three yet, so he is still somewhat afraid to test the boundaries too much. However, my sister and I were talking about this yesterday! Our mom was really good about sticking to the "zero tolerance" policy which means...each day if you stick to your guns on discipline in the small to big things, these big occasions don't happen as much. Its kind of discipline for us parents too! Here is a great article my friend Lauri wrote about her munchkins that really helped me!
http://brandenandlaurioneil.blogspot.com/2011/01/irony-in-disciplining-your-children.html
Its amazing how well our little ones can pick up on our reactions, moods, and methods. They are so smart. Believe it or not I was kind of a rotten toddler. My mom said I was spanked every day for a year! ha ha! My parents did such a great job though at agreeing on discipline and letting us know what was unacceptable.
I hope you survive....I know you will. It just might take some blood, sweat, and tears, but as God intends, purifying our hearts draws us closer to him!
love and prayers!
Anna
(HUGS) Hang in there, you are doing a great job as a mama! I'm going to send you a book that I really like: Shepherding Your Child's Heart along with the workbook. I did it as a bible study and learned so much! I know you don't have lots of spare time, but the workbook really helped me! I should probably read it again, so if you want to go thru it with someone let me know! You could also get some girlfriends together and do it with them. I have found it so helpful to listen to other mom's ideas!! Love you, if you ever want to drive up here, we'd love to have you:)
Ang
Oh Laura! What a day! I'm so sorry! On book that I've read that helped me with parenting is "I was a good mom before i had kids" The Author has a lot of good pointers and feel better stuff about being a mom. It's a hard job being a mom, but you I'm sure are doing a great job!
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